Staying at Home

I think it takes drastic measures to MAKE me stay at home to recover from a flu that I've been having for 4 days. >.< I thank Him for that! And thank you everyone for your care and love. =)

At least today I can stay at home to:

1. rest
2. wait for Joanne to visit (*^^*)
3. pack my room
4. think about what modules to take
5. write belated Christmas cards (>.<)
6. read my library books
7. reflect
8. SLEEP!

Oh no, I don't think I can do all these today, for I still feel a tad lethargic.
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I realise I fear.

I fear instability for it is when I am unstable that I cannot control myself, showing my true, ugly self with its desires.

I fear disappointment... perhaps that's why I'm trying so hard not to expect anything from people for if I get disappointed, it would really hurt. It is easier not to expect from friends than from your the other half. Perhaps it is impossible not to have any expectations from your other half... I think that's why that person can hurt you the most.

I fear vulnerability. People can just trample on what you are vulnerable the most, leaving you just totally robbed off of something so important to you.

Am I thinking too much again?

Argh..
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Okay... feeling better now... yes, I remember, I MUST be a giver and NOT a receiver this coming year.