Getting My Drive to Do Things...

I feel the strength to start to do things now.

MM practice was wonderful today. I felt happy that I could at least play my piece without stopping!! w00t w00t. Thank God for that. It's good to be a little oozy in the brain somehow, due to the flu. Makes one less panicky. *grin* I was starting to get really stressed out for I thought I wasn't going to be able to make through completing that piece. I have not practised the piano much this week and my playing saw a VAST improvement from monday... it's queer... where did my stage fright go to? For those who know me, I AM such a SPIDER. The jamming session later on in the evening was invigorating. I couldn't help myself smiling like a retard because I was just happy... happy to be able to make joyful music. Music is indeed heavenly... in whatever form it may come. It is an additional happiness when you're making music for someone you love, in this case, it would be for FOC, which is ultimately for God. One day I would like to master this song, titled "Head Over Feet" by Alanis Morrisette. Maybe one day I'll be able to sing this for my future significant other? *grin* In the distant future perhaps.

I finally got down to putting cash into my driving account tonight. Thanks to Dad for helping me. The biggest step was booking my driving test. I have to thank Shiming for accompanying me 2 weeks ago to get that done... for I have been traumatised enough by the whole driving experience that I just wanted to give up. When I tried booking my lessons online just now, I couldn't believe it... almost all the slots before the 20th of JULY have been FULLY booked! It's madness... I mean I'm booking over a MONTH in advance and I cannot even book 5 decent lessons in july before the 20th. Talk about planning in advance. Okay, I managed to find one free slot on the 19th july. Sigh... I hope people cancel some of their lessons in july *crosses fingers*

I haven't blogged about my experience at the retreat... hopefully I'll get down to doing that for I've things to say about it. There are more things that I have to do... hopefully I'll get them done as well.

How do I love? I hope I do not hurt anyone anymore. I don't know whether I offended someone tonight. I did it out of the best intentions... or I wish to think that way... I truly hope my thoughts weren't tainted by my own self-gain. But if I have offended you, I am truly sorry.

Please let me love the way You would have it dear Lord, for I know Your love is at its purest form - unconditional love. I hope now with my heart and soul healing, I will be able to love more purely, like a child.

Agape.