This week has been everything but normal.
On tuesday Jo and I met for a coffee break and chat. She was so sweet to ask what is it I wanted to do and even scrapped the movie to come mugging with me. But we ended up chatting anyway, which was great. =)
I have two people who, sadly, are not on talking terms with me.
I came into contact with one of them who I never thought was possible at this present moment. It was you who broke the ice and it was you who asked Joanne privately whether I was okay during the brief study meeting when I went to get water. You still can read me, in all subtlety. Not many words were exchanged but seeing is believing - you seemed fine, to say the least. All this while I couldn't forgive myself for the pain I put you through - that was the prison I had for myself. Now I can try to start forgiving myself. We part in peace. I thanked you with an indication of not needing to reply that evening. Is there anything more I can ask for? It is a new beginning.
Thank you once again.
I took a walk by myself to the Esplanade on one of the days as well. It was a hazy night, with the smell of charred wood permeating the air. Not a good time to sit by the river to reflect and let my mind take a break. Hence I stayed inside the building, listening to the rich sound of a live band performing middle eastern music. That brightened up my night.
In terms of studying, it has been progressing so slowly - had too many things on my mind to focus in the mid-sem break. Hopefully after a good rest I can pick up my pace tonight.
"Forgive me for all my faults."Thank you for encouraging me to visit my grandmother on friday, sitting down and listening patiently for almost an hour straight while I conversed wih her even though you do not understand the dialect... I don't really visit my grandmother of my own accord although I do care very much about her. Spending time with me my brother and I... going to my paternal side and being your sincere self with my cousins whom I love so dear... seeking permission from my dad whether I can go home late from a friend's 21st birthday party... encouraging me in pictionary because perhaps you knew I was feeling a little discouraged (I really am bad in drawing) and not caring even though we were like the last because having fun is what really matters... carrying my bag and walking
all the way out to take a cab because I wanted to go home, even though midnight charge would be over in one more hour... asking me whether I was afraid because the road was dead quiet and there were stray dogs roaming around.
You know my answer, and you know the reason why.
Agape.
