The world is passing by too fast!

I need it to slow down...
Sometimes I like to be alone... where I can let my mind loose and ponder.
My thoughts have been running all over the place - of the other, or myself, of how I treat my friends, of how closed up I can get, of whether I've been selfish or selfless.

Please let me keep close to You.

Agape.

Little Braveheart

There's a little braveheart.
A heart so small and weak
But within it
There's a hint of bravery
And courage

Many people may miss it
For it's so tiny
However, it's there
A speck of courage
In that little heart
Makes it a little braveheart.

心如刀割

It's as if your heart has been stabbed

A bleeding heart i have made. Another, a broken person. What have I done? This is not what I stand for, what I believe in. I believe that I should make people believe that they have goodness in them, and they are good, not to feel broken! What have I done? I am so sorry for the chaos.
These sorrows I should bear bravely. Do you call this restitution? Is it for a lifetime? If so, may I have the strength to do so.
I am stronger now with people to keep me afloat.
I love you all.
Thank you for calling me despite you preparing for a presentation.
Thank you for being here despite the roller coaster ride I am taking you.
Am I worth such trouble and inconvenience?

* * *

Please heal soon.

Agape.

Oh WHAT A Day!

I had a wonderful day today. *^^*

It's bliss.

Thank You and thank you... =)

Agape.

The Culmination of Work & Retarded Thoughts Ended in...

A TERRIBLE MIGRAINE!

Oh man. I thought my head was going to split into half. I've experienced this type of migraines before. Like you wake up and can't sleep because of the pain and you feel like puking. You can't sleep because it hurts, you want to puke but you can't because you haven't really eaten, you want to walk around but you can't because it hurts and stuff like that. I guess it's the body's way of telling me to NOT BE A SUPERWOMAN AND JUST HIT THE SACK! I really push myself at times and I forget to take care of myself. However, I know I brought things upon myself and I have to live up to my responsibilities... how can I shirk them if I had slacked before and stuff like that?

Thankfully I heeded someone's good advice and didn't go for dinner with Science people (although I really wanted to, to catch up with them for I'm always not in science) and also for the RCIA thingii... see, if I had put others before myself, wouldn't I have gone for those two things? Don't know lah... but I shouldn't even be not sleeping on tuesday nights in the first place right? Where has my time management gone to? Jo, think you're right... maybe I have a crooked sense of the definition of being selfish. Oh man, I think the closer people are to me, the more I make them worry. Okay I'll try to take better care of myself. Sigh, the bane of being close to me. >.<

So today I am now in my room, resting. =)

Agape.

Super shacked out.
Tuesday nights are gruelling man. >.<
Yes I did go for a walk last night and I cried in anguish over things that have been hidden deep down.
Hope I can last today.
I am thankful for that buoy to hold before I started sinking yet again.

I need to pray.

Think I need a good night's rest.

Agape.

Fall From Grace

Sometimes you just have to grit your teeth and hope that things will pass you by. I don't feel like getting out of my room. I just want to sleep and wait till nightfall and then go for a walk. I just want to walk and walk and walk. I need air. I need to clear my mind.

CA's later at 12pm.

***

Sometimes people do irrational things that are seemingly silly but it makes you smile and feel a little better. Time to get out of this seat.
(10.29am)

Yes, I should be thankful for certain revelations that come my way. I am thankful. Hopefully I can make it up somehow, or at least change to become a better person. I should be more optimistic about things I guess.

Thank you for the comfort, advice and support.

Finality, resolution, change

I pray with all my heart that life will be good for you. Knowing that you are okay is comfort in itself. I do blame myself for the unbearable things that you have to go through, and yet you can call me friend and sincerely wish me well? It's already more than I can ask for.

I am so sorry!

Dinner was good last night. It was like the good old days... the 5 of us. =) We had dinner at the Punggol Seafood Restaurant in Changi, near my place - My family plus Cindy. I guess the Lee siblings have things looking up for them eh? Ice wine!!!! WWwowowowooooo!!!!!!! However it wasn't chilled enough... so it was like SUPER sweet. Think my mom really rocks man... I don't know how much energy she has within her. Oh yah, all the 5 of us went for mass together. =)

Damn I need to study but I don't have much mood. I need to suppress this inner fluctuation / yearning thingii which makes me all edgy and anxious. Detach me please. Free me so that I may smile for others. I am stronger than I think. Lord help me.

Agape.

Hope

That leap of faith.
The simple promise that you'd be on the other side.
The hope that you had then.
The hope that you have now.
That hope transformed me.

Hope is indeed powerful. A father said that hope is a combination of love and faith. Let's all keep hoping.

Agape.

Prayer

Life has been good. =) However, I haven't had time to pray... so now here I am, pondering, reflecting.

Lord, I know deep down inside that You're a forgiving God and that You love us so much that if we do wrong and are sorry You would say "come to Me". I want to do more Lord! I don't want to keep sinning and repenting - I just want to stay in Your path; love in the way You called us to love. Guide me O Lord, Holy Spirit guide my path. If I do wrong, please please guide me away from it. I want to truly love so please don't let me veer from Your path. I want to get closer to You. Help me give up things which are not pleasing to You, which breed selfishness and hatred. Help me detach myself from things so that I may be free to love fully.

I thank You for allowing someone to forgive me fully. I humbly accept this pardon and I praise You for allowing me to live. I thank You that he had the courage to do so when I was cowardly. Thank you - I know you don't read this but I thank you.

Lord, we are journeying - and we have to fight our own weaknesses and personal afflictions. Yes, worlds apart are we, on two extremes - please be with us, please guide us, please teach us to love purely so that we may overcome our weaknesses and learn. May our own afflictions be healed with Your love and guidance. Let us never stray from You. May I learn to love you with a pure heart.

I thank You for everything - everything Lord. I thank You for helping me understand that the past isn't so bad and that I can truly forgive. Thank You for enlightening me that I may have wronged someone. Thank You for releasing my bitterness so that I can love.

I pray for the world and for those around me. Please let them realise that there is love and hope in this world because You love us with a love so divine. They may not be Christian but I know that You will touch them with Your love in other ways known to them. I pray that love will overcome hatred, be it between family members or between two countries.

Dear Mother, please pray for us.

Amen.

Panadol Nation

Really, I need to have better time management. Why do I always rush on tuesday nights? Am I leaving things to the last minute? Lab reports give me the creeps.

Thank you to you, wonderful lab partner who does so much.
Thank you to you for the moral support and care when I needed it.

You both know who you are. :)

I am one fortunate girl. I need to smile more!

Feel like pondering over things but my brain just won't let me. Sleep is indeed bliss.

Dear Lord, please be my guide today. May what I do be pleasing to You. May I love more and more and more! May I not do things that hurt You and people.

Agape.

=)

I felt a little selfish today but I just had to recharge and be inward-looking. >.< Feeling much better now! *grin* Recharged now and all ready to be functional and to try my best to love and do my best and stuff. *^^*

Not everyone is feeling as happy as me but I hope that things will turn out okay.

Thanks to a spy who sent an interesting pair of smses today!! >.< And thanks for the Runaway Train. :)

Thanks for the jog!
Thanks for the recharge and dialogue. =)

Agape.

I love mornings!
A morning denotes a brand new day, hope to a beautiful day.

Thank God for a peaceful morning. =)

Okay, time to start being functional. Lots of things to do, work and not work related. Weeeee.

You ask me a method of attaining perfection. I know of love - and only love. Love can do all things. - St Therese of Lisieux

Dear Lord, teach me to love today.

Agape.

Stability

It's hard to completely surrender yourself for the greater good of love. Being rational versus being emotional. I hate it when I'm unstable. I become selfish, I can't love. Why do I desire? I can't help it. Why can't I let go of my desires? Perhaps I just need another good night's rest and maybe my heart won't be so annoyingly crappy that I deem it weak. Control yourself Mich! Please stabilize. No more provocations please for now.

Salve

Sleep was good (I could have slept LONGER if not for a phone call which no one answered!!!!!). For the life of me, I couldn't get enough sleep for the whole week! Gosh I was tired. Really tired. This week has been a high to the point of delirium (pushes your energy to the limits) but it kinda ended up in a low. :( Well, a low simply cannot cancel all the high points of the week, can it? It's simply irrational. But you know, the heart is a funny thing, it only sees the recent.

Today is family day. I want to smile and be happy for I've only one day with them before I head back to school but it takes effort to do so with a slightly heavy heart. Remedy anyone?

Give me some salve to soothe my palpitating heart.

Agape.

Darn... sleepy

So sleepy... how how how?
>.<
Happy Birthday Shirley! *^^*

I'm not a good faker. I was practically palpitating from the stress.

12 hours more to rest and relaxation. Tolerance is a virtue.

Agape.